Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Defining Moments

We all have them at some point in our life. A moment so strong, so poignant, so memorable that we pin point it in our memories as the moment our life changed.

My moment happened in January, 2009. I was talking with my knee surgeon again about a recent fall I took that injured my knee again. His assessment was brutal. He wasn't kind. He was honest. And in no uncertain terms he told me, "Joanne, there is nothing I can do for your knee surgically that will make it feel better. The best thing you can do for yourself and your knee is to lose weight. For every pound you lose, you'll remove 7 lbs of pressure on your knee. If you lose weight, it won't hurt as much and you'll be able to move more. There is no other magical cure." I left his office crying. I felt broken. I felt betrayed. I felt like I was at the end of my rope.

It was that afternoon, driving the 2.5 hours home from the surgeon's office, that I decided I was going to look into weight loss surgery. My family doctor had mentioned it a year ago during my annual exam, so I called him back and made an appointment. Within a week of the exam, I was talking with the bariatric surgeon. We determined that I was a good candidate for the Realize Lap Band procedure. Two weeks ago I started my pre-op high protein liquid diet. On Thursday, April 2, 2009, I go in for my surgery.

I'm excited. I'm nervous. I'm a little bit scared. But I'm more excited than anything else. I know this is the right thing. I'm excited that at last I will have a tool that will help me control my eating and I'm determined to stick to the plan. This time I can and will do it. I haven't told anyone about this, but my family and my pastor. I was embarrased to admit that I was so heavy that I needed weight loss surgery to help me lose weight. Posting this in my blog is my first step to "come out of the closet" so to speak. I'll tell others. As they ask. As they begin to notice the changes. But I didn't want to be totally public about it, so for now, only you & my family know.

I was a bit wary about the liquid portion of the diet, but it really hasn't been that bad. Most of the products taste good (slight aftertaste), and those that don't taste good...I just don't use them again. I don't feel hungry and I'm drinking lots of water. Since my consultation I've lost 15 pounds (11 of which are since I started the liquid diet). I'll have to be on this liquid diet for 4 weeks post-surgery, and then will slowly bring solid food back into my diet. I'm looking forward to that day, but until then...I'm content.

Defining moments...a fork in the road....taking the road less travelled.

Calling All Crows

The other day, my dad & I were standing in his living room, looking out the front window when we hear this strange noise. Imagine, if you will, a very large crow. A sick-sounding large crow. Crowing at the top of his voice. Got that picture? Now, as we're standing, looking out his big picture window, we see his neighbor-lady walk across the street with a large plastic bag in her hand. What is she doing? Where is she going with that bag? Was she planning to do something with the poor, sick-sounding crow? Was she going to put him out of his misery, and ours? Again, we hear this poor, sick-sounding crow. But we can't see him. We see lots of crows flitting through the branches of the trees across the street, but no BIG crow. I mean, by the way this guy sounds, he's got to be BIG. Again, the crowing. And that's when we realized. It was the neighbor-lady. Crowing. To the crows. Calling the crows in. For dinner.

Only in a small town. No. Only in a two cow town. With crows.